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Bleed through

by Soja

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I keep telling myself its just not in my hands
(this seems outta my hand man)
For losing you slowly was just not in my plan
(this wasn´t supposed to happen like this)
I look to the sky sometimes, just hoping you´re there
(i don´t think shes coming back this time)
hoping you´re there (not this time)

Cause every time I pick up a pen its all you
and there beside me in my mirror, all i can see is us two
pages turn so fast like all those pages do
your words that bleed through
your words that bleed through

Get back in my arms and just hanging by my side
losing hold of you has left me dry
tell me where you run to and where do you hide
know you´ve never once left my mind

Tell yourself I´m sorry for these things that I´ve done
oh tell yourself never seen that love that gone no
tell yourself its over now and not to run
just tell yourself I´m sorry for what I´ve done

Cause every time I pick up a pen its all you
and there beside me in my mirror, all i can see is us two
pages turn so fast like all those pages do
your words that bleed through
your words that bleed through

Listen while I´m talking, I don´t do it too much
can´t help feeling that came between us
whatever happened to the way that it was
One thing I cant have is what I want

Who decided its gonna end up this way
who decided that you could not stay
you wont be here by the end of my day
cause i cant even listen to words that i say

But every time I pick up a pen its still you
and there beside me in my mirror, all i can see is us two
pages turn so fast like all those pages do
your words that bleed through
your words that bleed through oh e oh e oh.

I swear you never really miss it till its half gone
then you tighten up your grip trying to hold on
didn´t really appreciate it when its in your arms
then you can relate to every word in your song
like was i wrong but i know I´m right
but in hindsight, I blame the limelight
maybe i just needed time to get my mind right
maybe we´ll reconnect when the times right

I´m trying to think about the causes
was i too bossy exactly where the fault is??

I was told to step in love with some caution
cause love and shit is no difference in the darkness
but love is where the heart is
you can see the blood as its dripping through the gausses
So i guess I fell outta love with a smile and more love with applause´s
And its quiet in my house
your silence is my home
and everything reminds me
that I am all alone

Its quiet where you used to be
and now that you´re gone, there´s not a sound, there´s not a word but a dail tone

well its quiet when I´m drinking
its quiet when i smoke
its___ when I´m eating, always I sleep all alone
its quiet now it´s louder than i sit still like a stone
only from my dreams where you wont go

every time I pick a pen its all you
and there beside me in my mirror, all i can see is us two
pages turn so fast like all those pages do
your words that bleed through

don´t pick up that pen, no I, all I say
don´t look in the mirror, at all I am
the pages turn, the pages burn
and its all cause of you
(it was tears that were soaking these pages,
words that left me bleeding and pleading??)

How did i get in this predicament???
was I influenced by the benefits
cause I was hitting on so many chicks
lovin´ you and leavin´ you was the only sentiment
but I guess I wasn´t ready for ya
cause I´m rubbing your feet, cooking spaghetti for ya
taking you to parks winning teddy´s for ya
but in my heart I´m thinking there´s someone better for ya
but my hearts like ´no not this again´
cut it out black, you know how this will end
and I swear I really was listening
but my dick was yelling and my heart was just whispering
so you know who I listened to
now my hearts bitching cause hes missing you
got my eyes staring at some old flicks of you
when my nose swears that it can still smell the scent of you

and my soul is saying damn she was meant for you
(aw oh oh)
and my soul is saying damn she was meant for you
(losing a part of myself now)
and my soul is saying damn she was meant for you
( and I´m losing myself now)
and my soul is saying damn she was meant for you
(aww)

I´ve been wondering, watching
I´ve been waiting so long
I´ve been talking, I´ve been listening
I´ve been playing my song
I´ve been hoping you´d would be leaving
honestly you´re not
I´m not with you,
but i miss you...
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